DON'T Assume "It'll Work for You"

The first in a series of Do's and Don't's: Check on more info and posts here.

So, a couple of days ago I am scouring the internet getting ready for the Super.... I mean the Big Game. I come across this story about Colin Kaepernick (who I mysteriously can't read enough about) done by Rick Reilly (who I've read too much by). 

SOURCE: http://espn.go.com/espn/story/_/id/8897116/colin-kaepernick-birth-mom

So, this article is basically saying, "Colin Kaepernick should reunite with his birth mother, because it worked for my daughter." That's where this is going. 

DON'T assume "It'll work for you"

Rick Reilly made the arrogant assumption that his and his adopted daughters lives were a valid testing ground to figure out what Kaepernick should do. Quite frankly, it's a completely different scenario, with different players, different feelings, and different attitudes. Quite frankly, if Colin Kaepernick has no desire to ever see the woman who birthed him in favor of seeing the woman who raised him, that's his prerogative.

We usually do the same thing though. We often look at someone else's situations or hardships and offer our advice with a phrase similar to "It worked for me, it'll work for you." That's where we have to stop. People will turn your off and never listen to a word if you are arrogant enough to assume you know what's right for them.

DO Offer your story as a possible outcome

Now this wouldn't apply to Rick Reilly because he really should've never used the public form of ESPN.com to call out Kaepernick. However, in our situations, it IS perfectly acceptable to tell someone your story. If someone goes through something or has something that you went through, you can tell them what happened to you and how you worked through it. This gives them an opportunity to evaluate the possibilities and take in what you said. It also leaves them under no obligation to actually do what you did.

All Rick Reilly needed to do was say to Kaepernick, "Hey, let me tell you about the time my daughter got to meet her birth mother." Instead, he hit him with questions on why he hadn't met her and then wrote an article discussing on why it was bad for Colin to not meet using the thinly veiled reasoning, it worked for us, it'll work for you.

Hope this blog works for you

BGann